|▼ Medium 1|
|1||To the Listener
|2||Oh, You Shouldn't Skip the Introduction!
|3||Chapter 01: Oh, the Mistakes You'll Keep Repeating!
|4||Chapter 02: Oh, the Advice You Should Ignore!
|5||Chapter 03: Oh, the Personal Notes You Should Write!
|6||Chapter 04: Oh, Are You Going to Hate Your First Job!
|7||Chapter 05: Oh, the Drugs You Will Take!
|8||Chapter 06: Oh, the Orgasms You'll Have!
|9||Chapter 07: Oh, the Orgasms You'll Fake! (For the Ladies)
|10||Chapter 08: Oh, If You're Involved in Hardcore Bondage and Discipline, You Should Have a 'safeword'!
|▼ Medium 2|
|1||Chapter 09: Oh, Pick a Religion, Any Religion!
|2||Chapter 10: Oh, the Things You'll Keep Telling Yourself!
|3||Chapter 11: Oh, the Politicians Who Will Disappoint You!
|4||Chapter 12: Oh, the Person of Your Dreams vs. The Person You Can Actually Attract!
|5||Chapter 13: Oh, Just Looking at Your Spouse Will Make Your Skin Crawl!
|6||Chapter 14: Oh, the Violent Television Your Children Will Watch!
|7||Chapter 15: Oh, the Bad Investments You'll Make (And the Good Ones You Won't)!
|8||Chapter 16: Oh, You Should Go to Canada and See the Northern Lights Before You Die!
|9||Chapter 17: Oh, the Weight You Will Gain!
|10||Chapter 18: Oh, the Houses You Will Covet, and the Homeowners You Will Envy!
|11||Chapter 19: Oh, the People You Must Trample to Get Ahead!
|12||Chapter 20: Oh, the Books You'll Read!
|13||Chapter 21: Oh, the People You'll Sue!
|▼ Medium 3|
|1||Chapter 22: Oh, Watch Out for Disgruntled Former Employees!
|2||Chapter 23: Oh, the Giving Back to Your Community You Oughtta Be Doing, Instead of Listening to This!
|3||Chapter 24: Oh, the Best Is Yet to Come!
|4||Chapter 25: Oh, What Doesn't Kill You Can Have Lingering After Effects!
|5||Chapter 26: Oh, Laughter Is the Best Medicine!
|6||Chapter 27: Oh, the Loneliness, the Loneliness!
|7||Chapter 28: Oh, the Nursing Home You'll Wind Up In!
|8||Oh, the Afterward!